Break the cycle of generational trauma today!

What if the pain you’re carrying isn’t entirely yours? Could the struggles of your past generations be affecting your life today?

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In this article, we’ll explore generational trauma, an invisible burden that can impact your emotions, behaviors, and overall well-being without you even realizing it. As well as effective steps to heal.

So, what is generational trauma?

Generational trauma is the psychological effect of traumatic events that get passed down through families.

It affects people who weren’t even born when the trauma happened and stems from events like abuse, war, oppression, racism, or violence - posing ongoing challenges for future generations.

How is Generational Trauma Passed Down?

Generational trauma is transferred both genetically and culturally:

Trauma can cause epigenetic changes changes in our DNA.

For example, research shows that trauma can lead to DNA methylation in mothers, which is linked to higher susceptibility to depression and PTSD. Similarly, trauma can be passed culturally through unhealthy behaviors and patterns learned and perpetuated within families—from grandparents to parents and their children.

Let’s examine some case studies

(Note: These case studies are fictional and used for illustrative purposes only.)

#1

For instance, consider Brian and Sarah. They grew up with an abusive father who battled with addiction. For their safety, they lived with their maternal grandmother, who believed in harsh discipline—spanking, yelling, and shaming—which did nothing to improve the children's behavior. Brian, labeled hyperactive and disruptive, was already getting into fights at school. While Sarah developed anxiety and low self-esteem. Not only was she treated harshly at home, but she was also bullied at school due to her timid and insecure nature. Their early and repeated exposure to trauma elevated their body’s stress hormones like cortisol, which can be damaging to their brain and body systems—setting the stage for future dysfunctional behaviors.

#2

Another example is Kristen, whose mother Sarah became emotionally numb after the profound loss of her own mother. This emotional numbness unknowingly affected Kristen, leading to an insecure attachment style. She developed a fear of abandonment and became overly dependent on her partners for reassurance and validation while struggling to trust others. As a result, Kristen might become clingy in relationships or push people away to avoid getting hurt. In her quest to find the love and care she missed as a child, Kristen may seek out partners that are unsuited for her and end up perpetuating the cycle of trauma.

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Our parents and grandparents were our imperfect template for our existence. We must grow beyond their trauma as well as our own. It might be tough. But it is very possible.

Major signs of generational trauma

Generational trauma manifests in various ways, impacting our emotions, mental health, physical well-being, and behavior. 

1. Codependency:

Codependency means relying too much on others for emotional support or approval. This often happens if you grew up in a family with unstable relationships or emotional neglect.

2. Hypervigilance:

You feel worried all the time or always on edge as if danger is around every corner. This can be an inherited stress response.

3. Unhealthy Attachment Styles and Dysfunctional Family Dynamics:

Generational trauma can lead to frequent issues and arguments within the family. And this can affect you and your relationships. It might make you afraid of being abandoned, emotionally distant, and make your relationships feel unstable.

4. Family History of Mental Health and Substance Abuse:

Sometimes, family trauma can lead to conditions like PTSD, anxiety, or depression. And when substance abuse runs in the family, it can become a way of coping that gets passed down through generations.

5. Excessive Fear of Death:

While everyone fears death, generational trauma can make this fear extreme or excessive. This can be linked to the life-threatening events your ancestors went through. For example, if your parents survived a ghastly car accident, you might develop an unusual fear of dying when traveling on the road.

6. Low Self-Esteem and Self-Destructive Behaviors:

Growing up in a family where there was a lot of criticism or neglect can make you see yourself in a negative way. It causes deep-seated pain, lowers your confidence, and makes you hate yourself. In severe cases, it may even lead to hurting yourself on purpose.

So, what can you do if you are dealing with generational trauma? 

Let's break it down into three simple steps: recognize, repair, and rebuild.

Recognize

Take a moment to reflect on your life and experiences. Identify any ways you act, feel, or think that might be a result of past trauma. Talk to a therapist to understand this better and get support. Seek a professional diagnosis and address feelings of guilt or shame that are making your symptoms worse. Talk openly with trusted family members to help them understand and support you better as well.

Repair

Once you've acknowledged the trauma, you can start your healing journey. Work with a psychotherapist to understand where your trauma comes from and to learn ways to cope and heal. Connect with supportive and non-judgmental people who allow you to process your feelings, uplift your spirit, and make you feel safe. Family therapy can also be helpful for everyone to heal together.

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Rebuild

Focus on taking care of yourself by practicing mindfulness and daily meditation. Eat nutritious foods and make sure you get good sleep to help your brain and mood. Engage in relaxing activities like exercise, hobbies, or time in nature to reduce stress. If you're on medication, follow your doctor’s instructions carefully, and don’t skip any doses.

Moving forward, healing from trauma takes time, and it’s different for everyone. There is no fixed timeline. It might take months or years, so be gentle with yourself as you make progress.

Remember, generational trauma doesn't have to define you or your future. Instead of passing down pain, we can pass down healing. By taking proactive steps to recognize, repair, and rebuild, we can heal, end the cycle of trauma, and create a better and healthier future for ourselves and future generations.

Healing is possible!